Domesticating Instruction

* This is personal decision. Try not to feel judged since- really- I am not judging you.

Libertarian. I homeschool because I am one. It is as simple and as complex as that. John Knox, Thomas Paine and me. As my good friend (or so I pretend we would be) Frederic Bastiat observed, “The most urgent necessity is, not that the State should teach, but that it should allow education. All monopolies are detestable, but the worst of all is the monopoly of education.”

I am often quizzed as to why we took the educational plunge- a polite inquiry that better translates "What in the world possessed you to choose homeschooling?" Fair question.

Homeschooling conjures frightening images of appliqué sweatshirts, jeans hiked too high, and kissing cousins. However, this educational whipping boy has had a facelift- bringing sexy back to domestic instruction.  Perhaps it is the internet that has saved us from socialization suicide- so thank you, Al Gore. Or perhaps it is a trend - much like Kardashian lashes- that has found new life amongst latent libertarians like me. Either way: (Cue Montel Jordan) This....is....why....we...do....it.

1. I care the most about my child's education. Admittedly, there are truly marvelous educators vested in their students, tirelessly instructing America's youth- Dead Poet Society instructors who inspire and impart and unveil. But none of them will love my child like I do. None of them knows my child's strengths and weaknesses quite like I do. None of them desire the success of my child as much as I do. None of them invested 10ish months of puffy pregnancy and 18 hours of languishing labor like I did. My stretch marks speak to my greater vestment every time.

2.  I want to indoctrinate my children. Gasp! As garish as it may read-I choose to be the primary purveyor of truth to our impressionable offspring. Education does not exist within a moral vacuum.  The lens of worldview finds its foundation within the home.   Be certain of this- if you do not indoctrinate your children, someone else will. That's a privilege I have -literally- labored for and choose not to surrender.

3. I want to be with my child. Not forever. Not always. Not while I  take a shower. But-and here's the sentimental dribble-they won't be young forever. They won't want to be with me always. They will grow up. Marry. Move. Make choices. . . apart from me. The "whys" will end. The sticky kisses-cease. The hand-holding- stopped. Homeschooling allows me to savor a little more time.  In truth- most days, if I am lucky- the bathroom is my only sanctuary. But one day, I will cry (a little) when I don't trip on rubber ducky on my way out.

4.  I studied history. And ironically, it's public education that is the new kid on the scholastic block. (Did you like that clever 80's shout-out?) For the majority of recorded history, homeschooling was the trending educational prerogative.  From Mozart to Lincoln to Monet and Dickens, domestic instruction has groomed the proletariat and the bourgeoisie, alike. Public education swaggers (err, wobbles) on young legs since privatized instruction is- at least- the strong stride that built this nation.

5.  I am capable of doing this. Which is to say, I am literate and can adequately follow the provided curriculum. Not many of us are "homeschooling material." Heck-I don't even drive a mini-van.  True, there are a few moms- like my dear friend Liberty-who expose the sub-par educator/parent/human being that I am- Those exuberant women who take joy in lesson planning and science experiments and math fact review. That's just not me- but- it does not have to be. It's sufficient that I can read and that I love my students. Wilbur and Orville Wright did okay at home without a smart board.

There is more I can say but will stop since some of you are probably hyperventilating or seething with venomous homeschooling slurs. There are many parents I respect greatly who put their kids in traditional classrooms who love them with equal fervor and are equally committed to their education. This is a simplified response to a complicated decision.  But also know that that is the beauty of libertarianism which allows me to simplify a decision for my family while you remain wholly unaffected by it.  .  . unless you can't sleep tonight because this article got in your head :)